Holidays can be one of the hardest times after losing someone you love. While others celebrate with full tables and bright decorations, you’re left navigating the ache of their absence.
But just because they’re gone doesn’t mean they have to be left out.
Here are 10 meaningful ways to include them in your holidays — gently, lovingly, and in a way that feels right for you.
1. Light a Candle in Their Honor
Place a special candle at the table or in a quiet corner. Let it burn as a symbol of their presence and light in your life.
2. Make Their Favorite Dish
Cook or bake something they loved. Share it with others. Tell the story behind it. Let their taste and memory be part of the day.
3. Set a Place at the Table
Leave a spot open or place a photo, flower, or small item that reminds you of them. It’s a quiet, powerful gesture of inclusion.
4. Share a Memory Before a Meal
Invite friends or family to share a memory about them. It can be funny, meaningful, or simple — the goal is to speak their name out loud.
5. Decorate With Meaning
Use ornaments, candles, or colors that remind you of them. Consider creating a small memorial corner with photos and keepsakes.
6. Write Them a Holiday Letter
Tell them how you’re feeling, what’s changed, what you miss. Put it in a journal, tuck it under the tree, or keep it close to your heart.
7. Play Their Favorite Song or Movie
Let their favorite music play in the background or re-watch a holiday movie they loved. These familiar sounds can be comforting.
8. Include Them in Giving
Donate to a cause they cared about, or perform a random act of kindness in their name. Let their legacy ripple outwards.
9. Visit a Special Place
Take a quiet moment to go where they used to go — a cemetery, a favorite park, or just a place that feels like them. Bring them into the season with you.
10. Give Yourself Permission — to Feel, to Cry, to Celebrate
Whether you want to laugh, cry, cancel everything, or start new traditions — it’s okay. Including them means honoring your love and your grief, in whatever way is true for you.
The holidays may never feel the same — but they can still hold space for connection, memory, and love.
You don’t have to leave them out. Love doesn’t end with goodbye — and neither does belonging.
